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and in the fuck 'em category - Ambar
October 4th, 2001
07:45 pm

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and in the fuck 'em category
I am placing "Scarborough Research", a research firm who keeps calling me to get me to answer a purported five-minute survey about my media consumption habits.

"Please remove this number from your call list."

"Uh, ma'am, we're not trying to sell you anyth--"

<click>

That was the first call. Tonight, the guy had the temerity to sit and argue with me about my refusal to answer his goddamn survey.

"No. No thank you. I don't want to. No. I'm very sorry, but no."

No. Means. No.

I am just appalled right now, at the height and breadth and unmeasurable depths of the cluelessness that roams outside these four walls, on two legs, encased in DNA that's 99.99% similar to mine.

Current Mood: pissed offpissed off

(19 comments | Leave a comment)

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From:ex_lucianus799
Date:October 4th, 2001 11:34 pm (UTC)

Telemarketing bastards

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I don't know why they think pestering and alienating people will get them to cooperate, though I guess they don't care so much about accuracy as about filling out their checklist, BUT

The exact verbiage to use is: Please place me on your 'Do Not Call' list. (Anecdotal Reference)
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From:foxmagic
Date:October 5th, 2001 12:00 am (UTC)
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Wow, is this the Ambar?

Long long time no see. :-) Almost ten years, I think?

D'you remember me? If not, why not? *grin*

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From:kynn
Date:October 5th, 2001 09:59 am (UTC)
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I remember you!
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From:foxmagic
Date:October 5th, 2001 10:50 am (UTC)
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Kynn! Gosh! ;-)

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From:ambar
Date:October 5th, 2001 10:08 am (UTC)
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The one, the only, accept no substitutes, etc, yadda.

That was a whole pack o'foxes back then. I think I could still pick you out of a lineup, though. :-)

Ambar
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From:foxmagic
Date:October 5th, 2001 10:57 am (UTC)
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Let's see if I can jump-start my eidetic memory, then... ;-)

You, me, a few other people, back in late 1992...

... met at a Jack-in-the-Box in Sunnyvale, drove up to the Exploratorium... crawled through the pitch-black 3-D maze...

Then returned back to your place, I think -- I remember being surrounded by people talking about PernMUSH, and being surrounded by just about as many cats, with big fluffy tails...

I wonder, are these the right memories? Parts of my brain are scrambled. ;-)

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From:ambar
Date:October 5th, 2001 11:13 am (UTC)
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Cats and PernMUSH sounds absolutely right. I've been through the 3-D maze in the Exploratorium exactly once, and the only other person I remember in the party was STella. So I'm not sure about that bit.
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From:elflet
Date:October 5th, 2001 11:44 am (UTC)
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*boggles at the yummy thought of going through the tactile gallery*

We get free passes every year. (Well, OK, we donate and get 'em in return, but still...) Date? *giggle*
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From:lothie
Date:October 5th, 2001 09:21 am (UTC)
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I usually ask to speak to their supervisors...
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From:ambar
Date:October 5th, 2001 10:08 am (UTC)
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If they have the nerve to call a third time, that's probably what I'll do.
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From:elflet
Date:October 5th, 2001 10:17 am (UTC)

Why think small?

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Scarborough research's executives are all listed, with email addresses and phone numbers, at http://www.scarborough.com/scarb2000/aboutus/contact.htm

Putting on my survey-geek hat, one thing you can call and blast them on is trying to pressure you to take their survey. It's not considered ethical, or leading to an unbiased result, to coerce respondants. (See the code of professional ethics of the Marketing Research Association, which Scarborough belongs to. You can file a complaint against Scarborough.

Scarborough belongs to the Marketing Research Association, the Council of American Survey Research Organizations, and the Council for Marketing and Opinion Research. I only explored the Marketing Research Association.
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From:lothie
Date:October 5th, 2001 11:04 am (UTC)

Re: Why think small?

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Damn you're good.
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From:ambar
Date:October 5th, 2001 11:12 am (UTC)

Re: Why think small?

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Oh, he is.
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From:lothie
Date:October 5th, 2001 12:50 pm (UTC)
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Rub it in ;)
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From:ambar
Date:October 8th, 2001 12:50 pm (UTC)
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Is that a request for a massage, dear? :-)
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From:lothie
Date:October 8th, 2001 12:52 pm (UTC)
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Hee hee! It could definitely be!
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From:cyranocyrano
Date:October 5th, 2001 10:32 am (UTC)

TeleAnything

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I remember SallyMac becoming quite incensed when I would amuse myself with the telemarketers.
"You're wasting their time," she'd say, "And they're just doing their job."
"I didn't walk into their shop and say 'here is my phone numher, please call and take up some of my time'," I'd respond, "So I waste their time back, if I happen to be in the mood, and I get to amuse myself in the process."
I especially liked to do it with the folks who'd say 'Now, we're not trying to sell you anything tonight' but really were.
Of course, you're probably bored a lot less of the time than I am.
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From:yohannon
Date:October 7th, 2001 05:11 am (UTC)

teleshitheads

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I know...they're people too. But they're like tax collectors (also known as meter maids) -- you have to realize you're going to get shit just for taking the job in the first place.

I used to be a LOT meaner to them...I only had one call me back ONCE after I hung up. For some reason they get pissy if you tell them NO and then hang up...as if you were obligated to allow them to stick their foot in the door to keep you from closing it. Personally, I never understood that old travelling salesman technique...anyone pulling that stunt with me would wind up with a crushed foot. As such, they should consider themselves lucky to only get a click in the ear as I hang up the phone.

I especially love when they're obviously clueless as to who I am (ny wife and I kept our last names just the way they were, thanks!) so I wind up becoming "Mr. Gillaspie". Sometimes I get amusement out of replying, "Mr. Halbig, actually.", and then having them try to figure it all out.

Michele often reads them the riot act and THEN tells them they need to get a better job. I think I let them off light. :)

~Y~
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From:gconnor
Date:October 7th, 2001 10:04 am (UTC)

Unlisted

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I actually get much fewer calls since we moved, possibly because we have had an unlisted number from the get-go. We still get random calls of people just calling through all possible numbers, but they don't know my name.

The big annoyance for us is people who we already do business with, asking us to "upgrade" our account or something (extra "credit protection" is the worst)

I don't have as much time on my hands as cyrano, so I just say "I'm not interested in that" and hang up immediately if they try to protest or haggle. I know hanging up is slightly rude, but we ARE talking about unsolicited calls. I figure hanging up saves time for both of us.

My friend John from work said he used to just give the phone to the 5-year-old... interesting. Makes me wish I had decent speech recognition so I could hook the callers up to the old Eliza pseudo-a.i.
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