February 19th, 2002

You must be joking

a funny thing happened on the way to the wishlist

"When are you your own worst enemy?" she asked. "When I don't let myself know what I want," I responded.

Hence the homework. We all know the story. If a genie, a fairy godmother, a genuine magician turned up and offered you (any number of, because we also understand recursion) wishes, what would you wish for?

I'm finding my fantasy channel to be distressingly stuck. No, my erotic fantasies are intact, thank you for asking. And I have no more trouble wanting than any other soul living in the consumerist Western world. But wishing...

"Be careful what you ask for. You may get it." The lesson of all those stories: wishing can be dangerous, especially when done carelessly.

I remember, too, when I deliberately stopped imagining what the people on the other side of the computer screen looked like. Meeting them in real life became a delight, rather than an inevitable disappointment. That bit of projection is something I'm not sorry I shut off.

But wishing? And I know this has to be genuine, something which is both worthwhile ("The first three things on my shopping list" won't cut it) and not cliched. There are enough people visualizing whirled peas, not to mention world peace.

What would I wish for?
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