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new beginnings - Ambar

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September 26th, 2001
09:00 pm

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new beginnings
Tonight was the second class meeting for Differential Equations. I'm definitely in. *sigh* Back in academic mode already, which means that my mind wanders at least once per board-ful of equations, and I have to haul it forcibly back to the subject at hand. I swear I wasn't this distractible when I was seventeen. Then again, I knew a whole lot less about sex when I was seventeen.

Tomorrow morning, at 8am, I have my second appointment with the new physical trainer. I don't know if I'll be able to keep working with her -- her schedule just doesn't line up well with mine. And while I like her personally, I would prefer to be working with someone with more experience. Still, we'll see.

So, nine hours until I have to get up to make that appointment. And I have a 2 hour drive ahead -- I'm writing this entry from Erik's.

Still have things to say about today, though, which began with a visit to silkiemom. Her latest, Joshua, is a big flirt for a tiny baby. It was good talking with her again -- I'm not spending much time on-MUSH now that I'm trying to conserve connect time.

Then I drove from Roseville into Mountain View in record time. Spent the drive thinking about giving myself a report card on my life, a week and two days post-job:

physical health: B: starting to work out again is good. I'd be happier if I were scheduling 4 visits/week.
mental health: B+ Starting school was smart (even if Trip thinks I'm a card-carrying crazy person).
job hunting: D-. The resume is not finished, let alone posted, and I should damned well be smearing it across the entire universe.
spiritual health: A: Being able to work in a group is a delicious change. Having elflet around to compare notes with is wonderful. Complete revolution from six months ago.
social contact: B+: I'm staying in touch with people and not crawling into a hole to die.
general maintenance: C+: I keep making a good effort, but not finishing. Consistent effort is better than occasional marathon sessions...

Had breakfast with Edmond on Tuesday, who said among other flattering things that the reason my journal was interesting to read was that it was "violently personal". Well then. Far be it from me to disappoint the audience. :-)

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From:tersa
Date:September 26th, 2001 11:04 pm (UTC)
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And, hey, for some of us, it's the only way we stay in contact with you.

I'm sure there's an essay in 'the interpersonal merits of interaction via LiveJournal' in there somewhere...

Just to second Edmond (whoever he is, he is wise), I may shy away when things get too personal, but I enjoy getting to hear how your life is going. And I got an out-loud giggle at the first paragraph of this post. :)

Yay, working out! Yay, feeling good! Yay, school!
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From:ambar
Date:September 27th, 2001 07:09 am (UTC)
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Edmond is Tangent@TooMUSH, Alaric@PernMUSH (classic), etc. And I know I owe you email; I'm just hung on the cat thing due to needing to contact someone else I'm not much fond of first. It's not personal, I swear. :-)
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From:flit
Date:September 26th, 2001 11:10 pm (UTC)

The report card idea is interesting

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Though I might find myself wanting to grade on a curve.... :)

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From:diony
Date:September 27th, 2001 09:35 am (UTC)

violently personal

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This is a good phrase and an accurate one, and indeed, one of the reasons your journal is interesting. I'm learning more about you via Livejournal than I have in 10 years of on & off contact. Which is not so surprising, given the nature of muds and the nature of journals.

Reading your journal frequently makes me wish I was brave enough to be violently personal in my own. Perhaps eventually.
From:ossian
Date:September 28th, 2001 11:04 am (UTC)

Re: violently personal

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Oh, that's easy, luv. I dunno how Ambar gets along with her aggressively intimate exhibitionism, but I do it by being so entirely self-involved that I can forget, just for the moment of writing the entry, that what I am saying might be, ah, inflating my personal space to include most of the world (perhaps against the wishes of the inhabitants thereof) , and that there might be reprecussions (like general shunning, or lynch mobs) to what I am saying. Then I post it before I can wake up.

Ah, that warm enveloping introspection and verbalization, followed with the sudden cold splash as the realization of irrevocability brings you back...it's purifying, is what it is.

Why do I feel like I'm trying to corrupt someone?

--Scott, who could use a good purifying right now
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From:tamago
Date:September 27th, 2001 10:13 am (UTC)
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Yes. I approve of "violently personal" myself. It encourages me not to hold back my own posts as much as I might otherwise. And it's *really* nice to get to know you better in print since it seems our paths rarely cross in person any more.

*hug* on the report card.
From:(Anonymous)
Date:September 27th, 2001 04:49 pm (UTC)

Violently personal

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I also enjoyed the breakfast, Ambar. I had forgotten how delightfully sharp your laugh can be and how wonderful it is to provoke it.

I must be a real programmer now, I no longer see the office before 10am, so future breakfasts are possible.

- Edmond
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